Crowded Castle
by MikariStar
Summary: A collection of funny Suikoden short stories.
1. Chapter 1

A collection of funny Suikoden short stories.

Crowded Castle

Room 01: Out of Season

"No way..." Cleo couldn't believe her eyes; she had seen a lot of odd monsters, but none like that one in the great forest. "It's a..."

Camille tilted her head curiously to look at the flying monster that passed above them, not bothering to pick a fight. Of all the monsters they could find, "it almost looks like a mistletoe fairy."

Viktor only grinned, while Kirkis, unaware of human culture, asked "what's so important about mistletoe?"

"It's a lucky find," Viktor replied, "a very lucky find indeed and we happen to be in the precense of two-"

"No," Cleo interrupted.

"But it is our duty!" Viktor argued.

"Duty this!" Camille held her weapon against his throat.

"You two have no sense of pride in your own culture," Viktor grumbled and backed off.

Gremio shook his head, "it's not even Christmas; it would be breaking tradition, right Young Master?" One couldn't tell if he was pointing out a cultural fact, or simply trying to calm the atmosphere.

Teo's son paused, then nodded, he thought it was best to just agree with Gremio. Though Gremio had to admit, without actually voicing it, that Camille's disregard for the mistletoe, even if it was the wrong season, was rather a pity.

End of Room 01

Disclaimer, I don't own Suikoden.

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	2. Chapter 2

Crowded Castle

Room 02: Echo

"Hello!" He had been tempted to yell at the spacious empty castle, and he did.

"Hello! Hello, hello..." A voice much like his replied.

Tir smiled in mild amusement, their castle was certainly big. He was always surrounded by friends and allies so he wasn't lonely, though he sometimes missed his father.

Even so, Tir wondered what it was like for the small group left behind to wait in that huge castle. He wondered if there would come a time when the castle no longer answered him like that.

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"Hello!" Their group had grown beyond what anything Tir could have expected. Now there was no room for echo, as the castle was filled with the Liberation Army; but the reply still came, from all around, in many different voices.

"Hi!" "Welcome back." "Good to see you." "How have you been?" "Another successful mission, eh?" And many more, because echo or not, the castle would always have something to say.

End of Room 02

Disclaimer, I don't own Suikoden. 


	3. Chapter 3

Crowded Castle

Room 03: Stallion's Defeat

Tir's mouth fell open in shock, his eyes, wide and his expression regretful.

"Stallion!" Kirkis called, as he saw the fall of one of his own kind.

"Oh no!" Sylvina exclaimed, she never thought she would see Stallion facing a blow so sudden that not even with his super fast reflexes he could avoid it.

The commotion brought the attention of several others and the first few to arrive were Gremio, Cleo and Mathiu. "Give him some room to breathe!" Mathiu urged.

"This is terrible, but please do not blame Young Master," Gremio examined Stallion's injury.

"I'll get the first aid kit!" Cleo ran off to do just that, returning a few minutes later as a crowd continue to gather around the inured elf. "Let me pass!" She pushed through with the first aid kit in her hands.

"Stand back, give him some room!" Mathiu insisted to no avail.

"Enough!" Stallion yelled at the top of his lungs, as he pushed past the crowd at top speed, running around them and coming to a stop next to Tir who stood frozen, as if rooted to the spot. The blue haired elf rubbed his nose, "my poor nose."

"I'm sorry!" Tir quickly apologized. Stallion had been walking past when Tir opened the door; the hit was so sudden that no even the fastest of the elves could avoid it.

"Never mind," Stallion shook his head, "you don't have to make such a big fuss about it, I'll live." With his nose a little flatter than it was before, Stallion ran off to get some fresh air at the castle's rooftop, and to escape having the overly concerned Gremio bandage him like a mummy.

End of Room 03

Disclaimer, I don't own Suikoden. 


	4. Chapter 4

Crowded Castle

Room 04: The Cave

Tir wasn't sure why he went back there, to think, to be alone, to clear his head, those were some reasons, but if there was a main one, he didn't know. The point was that he entered the cave behind the shrine identified as the Cave of the Past.

As Tir ventured further into the cave, carrying only what he took with him. His footsteps echoed in the emptiness as he advanced with a slow but steady pace. Then he heard it, another set of feet approaching noisily, as if running.

"Master," the echo was distorted and eerie; Tir did not recognize the voice muffled by the harsh breathing.

Tir turned around and held his staff ready to face whatever monsters were after him. Then he saw the strange creature.

It was the size of a grown man, it's face black, it's breathing harsh, it's voice muffled, "Young Master!"

"Gremio," Tir was at ease, putting his weapon away when he recognized the one before him. He should have known Gremio would come. "Why in the world are you wearing that ridiculous mask?"

"Oh this? It's a gas mask, a new invention that I was given the task to test. I couldn't very well skip out on my duties, but I couldn't postpone my search either, I know you don't need my protection, but I worry about you, so I came to find you while testing the mask." Gremio explained.

"How would you know if it works, there's no gas here," Tir pointed out.

"Never mind that, Young Master," Gremio took off the mask. "It is best not to question inventors sometimes, or they might get inconvenient ideas."

End of Room 04

Disclaimer, I don't own Suikoden. Everyone should have been able to catch it, since this is a well known scene, but in case you missed it, Room 04 is a parody of the Star Wars scene where Luke enters the cave while training with Yoda. 


	5. Chapter 5

Crowded Castle

Room 05: The Girl Talk of Humans and Elves

"Guess what? Guess what?" The unmistakable high pitched cheerful voice, without a doubt belonged to Sylvina.

Though reluctant to trust humans, since Kirkis trusted them, Sylvina too tried to do so. The result was that now she was spending a lot more time with the group of human girls in the castle, than with anyone else, trying to learn their ways and finding more similarities between them and herself with each passing day.

"What?" Cleo tried to sound interested, but sometimes Sylvina got exited over the smallest things.

"I had a dream!" Sylvina exclaimed with joy.

Cleo, Valeria and Camille exchanged looks. They didn't know if elves dreamed often or not, so maybe this was a rarity for Sylvina, but most likely, she was just easily amused.

Given the silence of her human companions, Valeria took it upon herself to politely ask, "what was the dream about?" In hopes of ending Sylvina's expectant stare.

"We were all in it!" Sylvina announced with excitement and a hint of pride. She was proud that she had kept her word to Kirkis and accepted humans, she was practically jumping with joy that she had even gone as far as allowing them into her dreams.

The deeper side of Sylvina's thoughts, though one that rarely showed, marbled at how much humans could accomplish in such a short time, and made her wonder if elves were so few because of their idleness, leaving the active humans to rule over the world. But Sylvina wasn't one to dwell on deep thoughts for more than a few seconds and promptly forgot about such musings, instead focusing in the narrative of her dream.

The elf girl waited for everyone to be seated in her room, as per her unspoken request, which the human girls caught remarkably quickly, proving that they were more perceptive that she had initially thought. Taking a deep breath, Sylvina began her story, she loved stories, especially if they involved dreams; those were the most entertaining to her.

"We were all in that little pond in the corner inside the castle," Sylvina paused and amended, "well, not all, just Cleo, Valeria, Camille and I. We were at the girl's pond," Sylvina paused, receiving the nods from the other girls indicating they knew what she was talking about.

Sylvina continued, "Everything was as it truly is, the pond, the antiques, the wall in the middle, well actually, the wall that divides the girls' pond and the boys' pond was different, it had a small hole in it and Camille was looking through it. I think she was listening to the boys' conversation."

At this point Camille blinked in curiosity, unsure of what to say, while Valeria tilted her head and Cleo laughed. "Sure, Camille was listening with her eyes," Cleo teased.

Sylvina, ever the naive elf, looked amazed, "you can do that?"

There was a pause, until the humans realized that Sylvina was serious about her question, "I was kidding," Cleo clarified.

"Oh!" Sylvina nodded, but the others knew she didn't understand, while Sylvina herself was surprised that the mind of an elf was incapable of understanding a joke that was obviously clearly interpreted by all the human girls in the room. Perhaps Kirkis' fascination with humans had more justification than Sylvina had initially thought; they really were remarkable at times.

"Continue telling us about your dream," Cleo encouraged with genuine curiosity now, this could be amusing.

"Oh, yes!" Sylvina smiled, "Valeria was telling Camille she should not spy and Cleo was pretending she didn't notice. I asked who was in the boys' pond at the time, because for some reason in the dream I couldn't hear them talking past the little wall in the middle. Camille answered that Tir, Gremio, Viktor and Flik were there. Then she said Kirkis and Stallion had just arrived and went 'I can't believe this!' When Cleo heard Camille, she took a look through the little hole too."

The suspense hung in the air, and Camille grinned at Cleo for her earlier teasing, "so Cleo was spying too?"

"Yes!" Sylvina cheered, as if it was cause for celebration. "Then Valeria said 'what's the big deal?' and went to look too!"

"I would never!" Valeria defended, but it was just a dream, so it didn't matter, "go on."

"I was curious and asked what they were looking at, then Valeria replied, 'It's Stallion!' and Cleo added, 'that's amazing!' then Camille agreed." Once again Sylvina paused her narration, since she thought it was polite to listen to people's reactions about the tale. If she was one of the listeners, at this point Sylvina would be going "oh!" and "ah!" but the humans were so expressive that it amused the elf greatly and made her want to listen to more of their comments.

"Stallion!" The human girls exclaimed in unison, as they wondered just how much Sylvina could possibly know about Stallion. Though the small village of the elves had been a place where everyone knew everyone, that did not mean that they were all particularly close.

It was only one word, but the tone the humans used amused Sylvina greatly, even if she couldn't read beyond it, and she giggled, "yes, Stallion! I was curious so I asked all of you to let me have a turn looking though the hole on the wall and you agreed. So then I looked and saw Stallion and it was amazing!"

"Stallion!" The human girls insisted, making all sorts of obvious signals.

Sylvina's smile grew; she thought the girls' head, arm and hand movements were their way to cheer for her because she was such a great story teller. "It really was amazing, what I saw in my dream, it was much smaller than I ever thought it could be!"

"Sylvina!" Unable to keep his silence any longer, and triggering a wave of laughter among the human girls, Stallion revealed his position, standing beside Kirkis at the frame of the open door.

"Oh, hi Stallion, Kirkis, I was just telling the girls about a dream I had and you were both in it!" Sylvina smiled proudly, "Cleo, Camille, Valeria, Tir, Gremio, Viktor and Flik were also there, it's my first dream about humans!"

"That's nice Sylvina," Kirkis managed to push the words out, then glanced at Stallion.

"I was just about to finish the story, but I can start from the beginning again, now that you're here, so you can listen to it all too!" Sylvina offered.

Kirkis wasn't sure what to say. He glanced at Stallion who huffed, knowing it was inevitable that Sylvina went on with her tale, "just finish it," Stallion grumbled.

"Don't sound so upset, Stallion!" Sylvina honestly didn't understand, "you should be happy, because had a big part in my dream!"

"Don't you mean small?" Camille teased, and the human girls erupted in laughter again. While Sylvina was left in the dark, Stallion pouted and Kirkis couldn't stop himself from chuckling.

"Small?" Sylvina looked puzzled before remembering the part where she had left off in her narrative, "oh yes! Stallion's nose, I saw it in my dream and it was so small! It was even smaller than Kirkis' nose, almost as small as mine. It was amazing!"

Silence flooded the area, Stallion pouted for a new reason, Kirkis sighed and shook his head, somewhat relieved, and after a moment the human girls had another fit of laughter. Having Sylvina around certainly made their girl talk interesting.

End of Room 05

Disclaimer, I don't own Suikoden. 


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